Sahera Laing - Strategic Intervention Coach" data-"http://www.elite6.co.nz/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/Sahera-Laing-Strategic-Intervention-Coach-50x50.jpg 50w, http://www.elite6.co.nz/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/Sahera-Laing-Strategic-Intervention-Coach-66x66.jpg 66w, http://www.elite6.co.nz/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/Sahera-Laing-Strategic-Intervention-Coach-75x75.jpg 75w, http://www.elite6.co.nz/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/Sahera-Laing-Strategic-Intervention-Coach-100x100.jpg 100w, http://www.elite6.co.nz/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/Sahera-Laing-Strategic-Intervention-Coach-200x200.jpg 200w, http://www.elite6.co.nz/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/Sahera-Laing-Strategic-Intervention-Coach-230x230.jpg 230w, http://www.elite6.co.nz/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/Sahera-Laing-Strategic-Intervention-Coach.jpg 240w" data-sizes="auto" data-orig-sizes="(max-width: 240px) 100vw, 240px" />Several times a year a man walks over the threshold of my office and says something close to:

“I heard you were the chick at the beach that I needed to see”.

Sounds ominous doesn’t it? (Being politically correct has no business in my business.)

I respect the fact that for a man to phone me and book at appointment takes more courage than most people realise. Making that first phone call, is monumental for him. I also know, whatever they are calling about, is serious and no trivial matter.

They come in and sit on the sofa. Their eyes are darting all over the place and they often look as if they are about to run.

“So how’s this all work?” Would be the next thing I hear.

And so we begin….

They say men don’t talk much. And many do not. But they communicate all the time and they do it a lot better than they realise. Their body language tells me volumes about the emotions they are experiencing, or trying to hold on to.

We do all the formalities of paperwork and then just chat, check out the territory together.
They sometimes get up and stroll about my office, checking the curious books on the shelves, playing with trinkets around the place, look out the window into the garden. Some comment on the stream that runs through the property, the farmland on the other side and how peaceful it is hearing the waves from the beach.

Before too long, they slip off their jacket, grab a chocolate and sit back.
I hear things they may have never uttered out aloud before. The struggles, the having to be stoic, having to be strong when they feel like their are falling apart, scared of being vulnerable as they may appear weak, feeling lonely, uncertain, scared, lost, unsure, fed-up, unaccepted, unloved and close to the edge.

They get to finally open up and brain dump the thoughts endlessly circling their heads and we slowly place them all in order. The relief of being heard is enormous. I see it.

There are often tears, anger, frustration and then gradual reflection, laughter and, eventually, release.

We start to explore solutions that ease the tension in their brains, and their body. Shoulders drop, they start to breathe, and eventually their head comes back up and a smile of hope spreads across their face.

They know that they can get a grip of what’s happening to them. That there are ways to tackle what they felt was impossible. We untangle all those knots one by one, until we start to see clear steps on how to move forward.

We keep it simple. I’ve never seen the point of making it overly complicated and analytical. We don’t go digging up the past and relive it. We even work content free when required, and still establish workable solutions. We find a way to let it go and move forward.

When he leaves, he’s taller, a little more confident and self assured. We’ve built trust and we have started to clear the way forward. He has some strategies under his belt to be more resourceful and more empowered.

So when I hear a man say, “I heard you were the chick at the beach that I needed to see”. I know that men talk (how else would he have heard of me?).

With a smile, I reply:
“Well, if you are calling me a chick at my age, you can most certainly come in.”

And I’m honoured that they do and we work it out.